it couldnt get any worse than this...
there was nothing i could do about it...
no way to salvage...
there was only 1 way..
that was to put an end to all this..
and i had to do it myself....
i did..
and it hurt..
it really did.. i felt my heart sink...
the moment i turned away from you..
the tears just started to well up...and when it was too heavy..
the tears dropped..
do you know the pain i've been thru?
do you know how many sleepless nites i go thru...
just so that i can make you smile... make you happy?
Just so you know..
mood: very very very sad..
Listening to: Jesse Mccartney- Just So You Know.
fisherman's fren: leo ranted @
11:20 PM
11:20 PM
Sunday, August 16, 2009 >> abt me...
bad day at work today,
felt alot of feelings that was deemed unnecessary..
bleh..
what can i say...
i feel so unappreciated despite all my efforts to give in my best...
im quite sure i have always did so... in 2005.... right up till nw..
i have never given less than my best...
i have always put in my best in whatever i do.. and the same can be said for the effort i put into my work....
i guess the personality traits of a "Leo" is quite true..
a Leo needs to be constantly showered with attention,
a Leo is one who will love others who appreciates him for the effort...
a Leo is one who cants stand being forsaken..
a Leo can be easily jealous..
i guess im very much a Leo
for more..
read => this
mood: ranty
Listening to: Danny Gokey- What hurts the Most
fisherman's fren: leo ranted @
1:06 AM
1:06 AM
Tuesday, August 11, 2009 >> 好想念你。。。
已经是第三个星期了，
我们已经足足3个星期没说话，没联络，没看到比此了
我好想念你
好想跟你说说话。
你又为何不理睬我呢？
我到底做错了什么？？
请不要再这样，
我快受不了了
=(
to someone : if your blog post is about me, i would tell you honestly how i feel...
1) i dunno how long i need before im willing to let go
2) yes, letting go will make me less.. i dont know why
3) and yes who i was have diminished becos of the loss... =(
thats how much im affected by it.. i know many will find it absurd that i think its difficult for me to let go..... i guess you all can never feel the pain and hurt i feel
i thank you though... *sighs*
fisherman's fren: leo ranted @
9:32 PM
9:32 PM
Saturday, August 08, 2009 >> don't knw what to blog.. + mixed feelings.
hey,
its been awhile since i last blogged in here... many kinds of feelings as i post this entry... hmm read someone's blog and although now me and her are not in contact anymore, i still feel that her blog entries are very realistic and to the extend pointing to the realities of life...
and so..
should i follow what she says... or should i follow what my heart feels..
and give it all up... ?
i dont know...
i have this feeling that my life is going down...
like everyday's very meaningless now... im trying my best to make my dreams work out...but somehow all the bad luck i have is coming to me all the same time... stifling me, strangling me, making me unable to breathe...
im unable to concentrate on my studies...
like those negative thoughts just keep flowing into my brain....
birthday is coming... but yet im nt exactly excited about it like every other year -.-''
every year i jus wish that someone i love can be with me to celebrate it..
but every other year... im disappointed...
year after year...
plan after plan..
i jus feel.... maybe its not meant to be...
i told some1 that i feel that im a control freak... and when things go out of control... i freak out... i really dont knw why are things happening this way between me and her and maybe the others... maybe im just not gd enough for you all... i tried to reflect what went wrong and what did i do wrong... i jus cant seem to know what i did wrong... i mean if i did wrong, i really deserve the treatment... but i dont deserve this kinda treatment...
i really dont..
after what i did for you...
for your birthday....
i really hope u remember what i did for you...
and take into consideration my feelings ...
P.S. Xinen is bugging me to blog that shes mature but......
NOT SO FAST MAN!!!! =X
我们之间会不会有转机？？
mood: sad
Listening to: 潘伟伯- 转机
fisherman's fren: leo ranted @
11:27 PM
11:27 PM
